Priceless Art ~ a Christmas Present

Priceless Art ~


A Christmas Present

Grieving lost ones at Christmas

A touching and poignant piece by Julia.
I’m dedicating it here to all those who have lost loved ones, and still feel that empty space in their lives at Christmas.

I don’t think time heals so much as helps us cope. If they left our lives awhile ago, we can think fondly of those who have passed on; they will still benefit from our positive energy directed towards them. We can offer their memory a smile.

Grief has no time limit

It’s more normal than commonly accepted to still miss loved ones years after their passing. It’s OK do this; just hold ourselves and them with a mind of loving kindness.
Grief takes as long as it does.” (Namaste Consulting Inc)

If their passing was more recent and the pain is still raw, sending them our love in the form of prayers and lights will be of mutual benefit to them and us.
When someone has just died, they are still very present in our minds. The loving energies we send to them become guiding lights on the next stage of their journey.

Be mindful of the love we have in us and all around us this holiday

Screen shot 2012-12-06 at 16.15.08

To remember the dead is to acknowledge the coexistence of pain and love.
(Tim Muldoon)

By remembering those who have gone onto pastures new with loving kindness, we are honouring their memory. As long as we feel comfortable doing this, it’s a beautiful thing to do.

Be kind to ourselves, as well. When we are in pain we are like injured children, who need to be treated gently and tenderly. Being patient with our own suffering helps it to heal. And we’ll never forget our loved ones, “Something in our minds will aways stay.” (Sting)


Cherish those who are still in our lives now. Really be with them. Part of honouring those who have gone from our lives is treasuring the people who are still here.

The greatest gift you can offer loved ones is your true presence.” (Thich Nhat Hanh) Celebrating Christmas as you normally would, giving genuine smiles of joy – this is a real Christmas present to our loved ones.


* Related links (underlined) are given as offerings to go with this post.
Further thoughts on this:  Death & Love, My Very Old Friends

Dr.Suess image via deep-in-the-woods on Tumblr
(Click on images to make biG)

Journey with Julia

Another day, another loss . . . all great love has a cost.

Please remember just to breathe, as you take this time to grieve.


Life is our gift from God above, and He blesses it with love.

Some folks say these gifts don’t last, but God won’t rob us of our past.

These blessings that we receive come with no special guarantees.

One day here, gone tomorrow . . . one day joy, the next, great sorrow.


You won’t see that face again?

Just close your eyes, my troubled friend.

God’s gifts will never leave your heart

your memories are your priceless art.


One of the few pics I have of all the Kovach kids. It’s hard to believe that Teri, Chris, and Steve have all passed on. These memories are my priceless art.

 (Pic: Teri w/arms around Joe and Brenda; Chris next to her, holding…

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13 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. meredith
    Dec 05, 2012 @ 15:08:31

    I think you’re awesome to re-post Julia’s original post and share your thoughts about grief and holiday presents of ‘being truly present.’ I know that when I turn off a television or music so that I can hear my wife, I love her more than even I realize, and that all who shaped my life also brought something to the moment of that realization.

    I think it is not wrong to find our losses and know them. When I find a deep loss, I also find beauty. I learn, now, what I did not understand when I witnessed something a loved one showed me once… in another time.

    Today is my daughter’s birthday. She was one of my greatest teachers, even though I knew her for a short time. I cry as I write this… because it was so worthwhile to know her, watch her, and learn that a fragile, vulnerable child often referred to as ‘retarded’ taught me the wonder practicing patience; in the patience of even the hardest moments, I understood happiness.



    • Jas Baku
      Dec 06, 2012 @ 08:24:14

      Thank you Meredith, I’m sorry you lost your daughter. Remembering her birthday with such a loving, patient mind helps though, doesn’t it. Like you say, it’s true that without distractions we can really connect with the pure love we feel for others. This helps to heal the pain we feel for those who are gone from our lives. I feel honoured to have shared this space with you.



  2. Jinxy
    Dec 06, 2012 @ 07:40:28

    Thanks for posting this. I recently lost a friend to suicide, and her kids are devastated. I’m praying for her, but what about those left behind at Christmas? What can anyone say to them now?



    • Jas Baku
      Dec 06, 2012 @ 08:37:03

      Gosh that’s awful. I’m sorry to hear that Jinxy. But you’re right – your prayers and positive thoughts will be guiding lights for her now. Can you tell us her name? We can pray for her and her family too.
      And you can also be there for the family now. People find death hard to talk about, suicide doubly so. Just being there for the family, listening to them will help just so much. Don’t worry so much about what to say (you might not even need to say anything much); just be guided by your intuition and love for them.
      Good luck with it.



      • Jinxy
        Dec 07, 2012 @ 02:10:44

        Thanx, her name’s Michelle, and I have visited; but it’s been hit and miss, as they don’t always want to talk.



        • Jas Baku
          Dec 07, 2012 @ 06:42:30

          That’s OK, don’t worry if the family doesn’t want to talk. You just being there for them – your non-judgemental physical presence – is support in itself. Their lives will have been shattered by the sudden loss, and they’ll need time to accept the reality of what’s happened. Best just to let them know that you are ready to listen if / when they want to talk. Patience is invaluable here.
          We will pray for Michelle and her family.



          • Jinxy
            Dec 07, 2012 @ 19:50:46

            Thanx, I’ll bear all that in mind. Who will be praying for her? I’ll just say it’s some friends who have expressed concern. You know, I don’t want to worry them, but it would be nice to know.



  3. mummaz
    Dec 16, 2012 @ 13:29:16

    Listening to the terrible event at a primary school in America, my thoughts and prayers are with all the families of the innocent children who lost their lives, to a demented and very troubled soul.
    I hope they find comfort and peace in whatever religion they follow.



    • Jas Baku
      Dec 17, 2012 @ 10:42:01

      I can’t imagine what the folk in Connecticut are going through now, the bereaved families’ pain must be unbearable. Best we can do is send them all our compassionate prayers and healing energy.
      May they all find everlasting freedom from their suffering.



    • Jas Baku
      Dec 18, 2012 @ 08:25:49

      Overwhelmed with sadness
      Twenty beautiful children
      Six heroic teachers
      I can’t imagine

      In the stillness of dawn
      The rain falls and
      I wipe away my
      tears from heaven

      Extract from “Tears from Heaven‘, by Peggy.



  4. Jas Baku
    Dec 26, 2012 @ 17:00:23

    The Gift of Practice – This holiday season, we have a chance to express our love and care for Mother Earth by the way we care for our self, our family and our environment. We can practice mindfulness to care for our inner environment, our feelings and our emotions so that we do not lose our self in worries about the future or regrets about the past, or lose our self with our feelings and thinking in the present moment. We practice in such a way that we are peaceful, free and happy right in the here and now. We can practice to be more relaxed in our body and mind as we drive our car to work, or cook for our family, or play with our friends, or even rest when we return home. We can look deeply into our relationships with our loved ones, with our environment, our neighborhood, and our workplace and find skillful ways to care, to renew and to improve them. Care is a priceless gift.
    Br. Pháp Dung



  5. Trackback: Death & Love, My Very Old Friends | Cosmic Loti

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